Old Married Couple Jokes–Funny Couple Jokes| Retirement Humor

Old Married Couple Jokes

Let’s read Married Couple Jokes  about Funny Couple Jokes, Retirement Fun Facts

There was this couple who had been married for 50 years.

They were sitting at the breakfast table one morning when the old gentleman said to his wife,

“Just think, honey, we’ve been married for 50 years.”

“Yeah,” she replied,

“Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together.” “I know,” the old man said,

“We were probably sitting here naked as jaybirds fifty years ago.”

“Well,” Granny snickered,

“What do you say…should we get naked?”

Where upon the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table.

“You know, honey,” the little old lady breathlessly replied,

“My nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised,” replied Gramps.

“One’s in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal.”

Social Security Jokes– Retirement Humor| Daily Jokes

Social Security Jokes

Let’s read Funny Social Security Jokes  about Daily Joke, Social Security Fun Facts

A retired gentlemen went into the social security office to apply for Social Security.

After waiting in line a long time, he got to the counter.

The woman behind the counter asked him for his drivers license to verify his age.

He looked in his pockets and realized he had left his wallet at home.

He told the woman that he was very sorry but he seemed to have left his wallet at home.

“Will I have to go home and come back now?” he asks. The woman says,

“Unbutton your shirt.”

So he opens his shirt revealing lost of curly silver hair. She says,

“That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me.”  and she processes his Social Security application.

When he gets home, the man excitedly tells his wife about his experience at the Social Security office. She said,

“You should have dropped your pants, you might have qualified for disability, too.”

Priest Rabbi Joke–Actress Jokes| Funny Priest Jokes

Priest Rabbi Joke

Let’s read Actress Jokes  about Funny Priest Jokes, Priest Fun

A famous actress of the film dedicated to adults goes to the church to make her own confession to the priest.

She tells him her sins, related mainly to her world of work.

The priest listens carefully and after a while his breathing becomes labored.

“You are a priest” – he was telling to himself – “you have to resist to the temptation”.

The actress realizes that the priest was excited and she begins to feel that way too. Her story becomes even more hard, more detailed and she begins to unbotton her shirt.

The priest sees what happens and start to sweat heavily.

“You are a priest, you must resist” – he continues to encourage himself.

In the meanwhile, the woman took off her bra, skirt and her underpants.

Turned on, she was starting to get nervous because the priest did not pass to the action.

So she leaves the confessional. The man follows her.

She sits on the altar, raises a leg and starts to touch herself, all in front of the priest who was getting crazy.

He looks up to the top and looks at the statue of the Jesus.

– Jesus, help me. Tell me what to do.

– Take me away from the cross! Take me away from the cross!

Women Shopping Jokes–Jokes About Shopping| Joke For The Day

Women Shopping Jokes

Let’s read Jokes About Shopping  about Basket Joke, Shopping Fun

A lady is doing her daily shopping in the store near place she lives.

She bought low fat milk, eggs, orange juice, salad, coffee and meat.

While she was unloading the shopping from the basket, a drunk guy, who was standing behind her, was observing.

While they were waiting in the line, the drunk guy says quietly:

– I guess you are not married.

The woman, slightly surprised by this statement, shows to be intrigued by the intuition of the drunk guy because he was right and she was not married.

She turns back looking at her shopping without finding nothing strange, nothing that can show she was single.

All at once she says:

– You are right. Tell me, how did you guess?

– You’re tremendously ugly!